Convictions lost

My convictions failed me today. It’s not the first time.

Of course I am disappointed. Not in myself as much as in the system. But it is not something I can control. So I will let it go. The outcomes are inconsequential.

I have lived long enough to know that things don’t come easy to me. So let’s just accept the stars we are born under and the cards we are dealt with. I know I have taken several bad set of cards and turned the game around. And I can do it this time too. And if I cannot then it’s a sign for change.

Today, I feel a certain disengagement from the system. As if it doesn’t matter anymore. But why am I lying to myself. It does matter. I am part of the system. I have to live within it. At this moment, I just don’t care enough for the system to define my worth. May be I will regret this some day. But I don’t care about it enough, today.

It’s relatively easy to smile when you are disappointed . But it is much more difficult to find passion. I struggled a bit today. But it was not impossible. It hasn’t been a great year so far, and there are no signs of it getting any better. So I am going to reset my expectations and go live a life…

Smile we must, let’s wipe off the dust

In self we trust, coz life can often be unjust 🙂

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