I’ve been having a lot of career chats lately. None about me of course. It’s been an interesting week in that respect. I have expended over 6 hours in last 7 days helping people make career decisions. I don’t know why they think I can help them, when I haven’t been able to help myself all this while. I mean what is a career after all? I’ve never seen it as climbing a ladder. But I am always watching out for my sphere of influence and whether it is growing or shrinking. Why is that not a universal measure?
To be honest, I am confused. I don’t think my sphere of influence has increased in last 6months. But it has become deeper. In terms of my professional relationships. I am not very excited about how things are with my own career today. And it’s better that I acknowledge it. I don’t see a need to act yet. But I am watching out for how the tides will change. Because times they are a-changing, said Dylan
I love having career chats with people. It gives me a sense of fulfillment and focus that cooking does. I enjoy those moments of honest admittance and brutal confessions. They are good for us. As humans we help each other cleanse. But I get disappointed when someone tries to converse with me superficially. It sucks the joy away. It demotivates me. I wonder why people can just not be honest with each other and themselves. I wish humans were more trusting.
Anyhooo – all these career chats make me nostalgic. I want to also share my aspirations and goals with someone who’d listen. But I don’t have many people around me who’d do that anymore. I lost two last year, and with some org changes and exits, I am feeling a little lost. Perhaps time to find some new coaches and renew my vows with the older ones. The year is just starting after all.
In a disruptive conversation yesterday, I asked Agam if we should plan to move out of Bay Area in a few years. He was not surprised. But he asked me a lot of questions to help me identify what I am running from. I know he wanted to make me realize that I can change the State, but I might also need to change who I am.
Regardless, it was a delightful debate. He is right, the changes I seek are in my control. But again, I want this for all of us. And mostly Tara. The pressure we face will be hers to deal with too, in a few months when school starts. We don’t think we are ready or even planning to pull any trigger. But I am certain to research and learn about creating a life away from this noise. I don’t want to run in this race. And I don’t want Tara to learn that life is just about running. Because that’s exactly what my upbringing did to me. And my father invested in me to learn to do better than that.