Salt and Pepper

I am so tired and yet so happy about how I spent my energy this week. Especially tonight when Tara and I hung out at the book shop, listening to great music and reading our respective books. It was perfect chill-pill time to end a very very exhausting week. Agam joined us after an hour and we enjoyed our fall night stroll in downtown. A befitting end to a whirlwind week.

Last night I slept for 8 hours straight. For the past 2 weeks, my night sleep was split into 10pm-2am and 4am-7am shifts for almost two weeks. The schedule took a toll on my energy levels. But the night shifts were worth it. I definitely realized the importance of a good night’s sleep. I need my 8 hours or I am dysfunctional. But lately I have been challenging that. Not something I want to do often.

The week was crazy in other respects too. We had our annual team summit on Tue-Wed and a team fun event in Half Moon Bay, on Thursday. A team summit is like a family wedding. A happy one to that. I love meeting people from different parts of the world and hear their stories. It is so much fun to put faces to names. I thrive on the energy I derive from my interactions with people. So I usually look forward to such events. So energizing! But since I had a night shift and a day shift, the event left me super tired and exhausted. So much so that I didn’t want to even roll out of bed this morning. If it wasn’t for Tara, I would have just slept and taken the day off.

Tara is turning 5 in a few weeks. I just cannot believe how time flew by. As always there are plans for a whole week of celebrations. We start on Nov 22 with Frozen II with all her girl friends and their parents, then dinner with Super Daadi, Krishna Auntie and Joel Uncle on 23rd. Followed by celebration at her school on 26th, followed by dinner with her favorite Uncles and Aunts that night. And then we end it with a bigger kids party at Pump It Up on the 1st. We make up for the lack of her siblings quite well. Phew. On that note, this is going to be our first Thanksgiving in Bay Area.

Although the week went off well I failed at a personal commitment. And I am sort of regretting it. The Jaipur Lit Fest had organized a writer’s contest called I-write. And after much consideration I had decided to send my short list of meaningless poems to the contest. But the deadline was Nov 14th IST. And given how my week went, I ran out of steam. I was 70% there, but I could not find the time and the energy to take it all the way. I didn’t stand a chance. But once again I disappointed myself with my inability to take my personal goals seriously. I mean, if I can stay up for work why couldn’t I stay up all night to finish writing snippets for each of my poems. I don’t know why. Or may be I do and I am just afraid to accept it. Anyways, I am disappointed in myself. I feel like I should still complete it and keep it ready for another such event. So what if it is worthless. At least I will finish what I started. May be I will spend a few hours on it this weekend.

At a summit group dinner, I looked around the room bustling with people. My team spread across the room, engaged in animated conversations with other folks from the team, having a good time. It gives me a lot of happiness to see a group of people having a great time together. I slipped into my moment of reflection and as a result ended up sharing a very candid chat with a peer at work about what we expect from our professions, ourselves, and why we work. I don’t know what motivated me to start the conversation. But I am glad I did. Behind all the serious faces, is a human, willing to tell you more, if only you will take the time to ask. Given that we were both on our nth glass of wine, I am pretty sure I don’t remember half the conversation. But I do remember feeling quite blessed in his company. Summits are like a family wedding. Full of moments that becomes sweet memories. That conversation will always be etched in my memory.

I spent a lot of energy, socializing this week, so I am looking forward to a quiet, coffee and a book type of weekend. The fact that it is starting with some writing is also a good sign… I bough Angela Duckworth’s GRIT. Let’s see what it teaches me this weekend..

to silence and calm.. and GRIT

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